Posts filed under 'Insightful'
NAIL IN THE FENCE
There once was a little boy who had a bad temper.
His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.
The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out.
It won’t matter how many times you say “I’m sorry”, the wound is still there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.
Friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend a ear, they share words of praise and they always want to open their hearts to us.
Please forgive me if I have ever left a hole.
August 30th, 2008
An orange, liquid soap and a music concert…what do these three have in common? All three have taught me some lessons in life.
The Orange
I was sitting on our sofa in Owensboro eating fruit with the family. Watching my dad peel orange after orange, one fact became repeatedly clear: these oranges had a lot of seeds. Each slice that I popped into my mouth (sometimes 2 or 3 slices at a time), yielded a few seeds that were spit out in the seed bowl. Slice after slice, and orange after orange, we enjoyed the fruit and enjoyed the medavo. So where is the lesson?
Sometimes when evaluating new endeavors (for example big career moves), nothing seems to be without challenges. This shouldn’t stop us from making those bold choices anyway. We don’t not-eat the orange, just because we have to work to filter out the seeds.
The Liquid Soap
Shortly after I moved to California, I was out shopping to furnish my new apartment. I was in the soap aisle, and the question on my mind at the time was, “which liquid soap to buy?” There was the SoftSoap, Dial, etc etc. My friend who was shopping along with me, advised me to buy two instead of one because I will surely need another one soon anyway.
While pondering this choice (one or two), I noticed the “half-gallon” liquid soap refill containers. They were 3x the cost of one liquid soap container…but had much more than 3x the soap. I was contemplating buying the refill container…but my friend was advising me to just buy the normal two small containers, “How much soap are you going to use anyway?” I made the call and bought one normal size SoftSoap, and one refill container. It was an investment…and it cost a lot more than just buying one SoftSoap.
Last week, I refilled my SoftSoap container for the 4th time since that day. Every time I look at my SoftSoap in the bathroom now, it reminds me of a lesson: invest for profit in the long-term.
The Music Concert
A few weeks back, I went to a concert. I was with a friend. We were almost late, and had just arrived, rushing to get inside. It was too crowded outside to walk side by side–we were dodging people left and right to walk. He was leading and I was behind. I noticed that I was having a hard time keeping up with him, and was falling behind easily. He would make some maneuver which was the right move for where he was, but when I would try to follow the same thing, there may be someone in my way or the situation would be slightly different, and as a result I was lagging behind.
I decided to adopt a different strategy. Instead of following right behind him, I shifted a few feet to the right and started making my own way through the people. This turned out to be much more effective, and I was able advance through the crowd at the same pace as him! I just had to make all the maneuvers myself (essentially find my own way through).
So the lesson learned? No one person or role model can teach you “the” right way to live life nor is there a set “forumla” for success. It is important to find your own calling. We must be individuals first, and only then can a partnership work well.
I hope the lessons I shared from an orange, liquid soap and a concert proved somewhat insightful for you too 
January 4th, 2008
I found this interesting article. Enjoy and may be follow the principle.
Mahendra
The Law of the Garbage Trucks
How often do you let other people’s nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day?
Unless you’re the Terminator, for an instant you’re probably set back on your heels. However, the mark of a successful person is how quickly she can get back her focus on what’s important.
I learned it in the back of a Harare City taxi cab. Here’s what happened. I hopped in a taxi and we took off for Westgate. We were driving when all of a sudden a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his
breaks, skidded, and missed the other car’s back end by just inches!
Here’s what happened next. The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. How do I know? Ask any Zimbabwean, some words in Harare come with a special face.
Now, here’s what blew me away. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, “Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!”
And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, “The Law of the Garbage Truck.”
Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they’ll dump it on you. When someone wants to dump on you, don’t take it personally. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You’ll be happy you did. I guarantee it.
So this was it: The “Law of the Garbage Truck.” I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home, on the streets? It was that day I
said, “I’m not going to do it anymore.”
I began to see garbage trucks. Like in the movie “The Sixth Sense,” the little boy said, “I see Dead People.” Well now “I see Garbage Trucks.” I see the load they’re carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my Taxi Driver, I don’t make
it a personal thing; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and I move on.
One of my favourite Football players of all times, Ronaldino, does this every day on the football field. With a smile he always jumps up as quickly as he hits the ground after being tackled. He never dwells on a hit. Ronaldino is always ready to make the next play his best. Good leaders know they have to be ready for their next meeting. Good parents know that they have to welcome their children home from school with hugs and kisses.
Leaders and parents know that they have to be fully present, and at their best for the people they care about.
The bottom line is that successful people do not let Garbage Trucks take over their day.
What about you? What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more garbage trucks pass you by? You’ll be happier
May God Bless You With Health,Happiness and Prosperity Always
September 30th, 2007
Something that i am proud of:
I pray everyday.
I love spending lots of time with elders.
I mostly eat at home.
I make it a point to learn something new everyday.
Nothing can stop me from getting what i want. If I want anything for myself, all i have to do is want it and nothing will possibly come in my way.
I dream and i achieve.
I have clarity of thought.
I am deeply committed to making a difference in the world.
I respect women.
I actually listen to people when they are communicating opposed to hearing them and have mind conversations about the things they are saying.
Education for everybody in this world is something that i will give my life to transform.
I have been an avid reader of books nowadays.
I love having an intelligent conversation over a cup of coffee.
I am excited about everything in my life.
I don’t think i have the word anger in my dictionary and you will hardly see me upset or off mood.
I am full of life and want to live it to the fullest, who knows what’s there in store tomorrow.
I feel deeply, powerfully for people that matter to me in my life.
I am considered creative and innovative by people around me.
I am full of ideas and am working on a plan to implement those.
I don’t drink neither do i smoke.
Something that is a harsh reality and i am working on it:
I couldn’t live to my parents expectations to be the top student in my Engineering and Masters Studies.
I have also got C+ grade in my courses for Masters at USC.
I am a failure in my own eyes because i haven’t been able to complete the Kutchi Dictionary project that i took on.
I seek a career change from the Software Industry.
I am impulsive at times and react without thinking.
I need to get 8 hours of sleep daily which has become a dream since the time i came to the US.
My health is good but fitness is bad. Low immunity levels.
These are my random weekday musings.
Thank you for your patient listening.
Paras Mamania
May 31st, 2007
You may have read this quote before, but for those of you who haven’t take a look. It has started ringing more true to me lately than ever, so I thought I would share with you.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,
fabulous, talented? Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of the Spirit. Your playing small
does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that
other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of the Spirit
that is within us. It is not just in some of us;
it is in everyone.
And, as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
-Marianne Williamson
This quote was used by Nelson Mandela during his 1994 inaugural speech.
February 6th, 2007
As Jains/Vegetarians/non-drinkers/etc we often have to deal with people who dont understand us or refuse to. The insight steve pavlina offers on this is enlightening…our annoyance with “close-minded” people actually comes from our own fears. This is Anekantvad kind of thinking! Read on…
How can you intelligently deal with people who are close-minded, totally stubborn in their beliefs and unreceptive to new ideas? Perhaps you feel certain you’re right and they’re wrong, but you can’t seem to convince them to see things your way. And maybe you are in fact right, but that doesn’t prevent the other person from resorting to irrational arguments to keep from agreeing with you. What can you do in such situations?
I’d like you to consider this challenge from an angle you may not have considered.
When you encounter people who are very close-minded, you’ll often find yourself becoming resistant to the other person’s position. You think the problem lies with the other person, but if you define it that way, you’ll beat your head against the wall in frustration. The real source of your frustration is your own resistance, not the other person.
The lesson in such situations is to learn unconditional acceptance, which comes about when you begin asking questions like: Why do I feel such resistance towards close-minded people? Why do I feel the need to convince them of anything? Why do I have such a strong need to be right? What part of me is experiencing this resistance? Is it possible there’s any shred of truth in the other person’s position?
As you explore these questions, you’ll begin to uncover the part of yourself that is resisting what the other person represents to you. Then you can consciously decide if you wish to continue holding onto that resistance or let it go. The more you resist about the world, the more time you’ll spend defending your position.
Resistance comes from your ego. When your ego takes ownership of your ideas, it treats challenges to your ideas as a personal challenge, hence the need to defend yourself as if being attacked. But if you keep your ideas separate from your ego, you’ll feel no surge of resistance or defensiveness because there won’t be any attachment.
from Steve Pavlina’s article: http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/11/dealing-with-close-mindedness/
December 22nd, 2006
I read an interesting article on Ramit Sethi’s blog today, thought I would share. Here is a quote from the article:
The most successful people I’ve met started off removing barriers for themselves–and then for people they wanted to impress. In other words, to become useful, think of how you can be useful to someone else. Some things I’ve learned:
When you go into a meeting, have duplicate copies in case your coworker forgets his.
Spend 5 minutes organizing your papers and to-dos before you go to sleep, so when you wake up, you’re ready to go.
If you don’t get a response to an email, don’t write another email saying, “Did you get my email?” Instead, write this: “I’m not sure if you got a chance to look at this. What do you think? I’ve pasted it below to make it easier for you.”
When you email someone to schedule a meeting, use their time zone, not yours.
Carry a pen.
Also when scheduling meetings, include your phone number on the last correspondence in case they get lost.
Anticipate what people will need and make it happen before they ask. If you run a web site or web app, figure out what your users are going to complain about and address it before they do—or even just acknowledge it. They’ll love you for it. If you go out to a business dinner, have the check taken care of in advance. And if your roommate is going to run out of milk, pick up another carton before he does.
I learned a lesson in being useful when I noticed Manu Kaka always calling home before coming home from work whether the moms needed anything from the supermarket for the kitchen. Or when a friend of mine brought me dinner to my apartment when I was sick without asking me.
Useful people are generally more valued in business and in life. How can you take some steps to be more useful to your world today?
September 29th, 2006
Since August of 2004, when I joined Cerner in Kansas City, I have been living the single, “bachelor,” life. I have my own apartment, a healthy source of income, a decent amount of “free time.” When I was in college this seemed like a destination, I wasn’t really looking beyond this stage. But now, I am more confused about what next to do with my life. During the day I work for Yahoo! and after work I work on my ideas for “the next big thing.” Anyway…the reason for this post is that all throughout this ride, I have learned some things about life I wanted share with all of you. My intention is not to give everyone advice on how to live life, because I know most of you are older and wiser than me. I had made this list for myself in my diary…my intention is just to share this with you, so you can get a glimpse of where I am mentally in my life. Ok…so here is the list…please share your thoughts and insight
The lessons…
- Doing well in school is not the same as doing well in life.
- This sounds cliche, but it’s true: You must never forget where you come from. Keep your feet on the ground and your eyes on the stars.
- Luxury is over-rated. I have realized I was much more mentally comfortable driving the red 91 Civic than my 2005 Acura.
- Home cooked food is highly under-rated.
- Pressure cookers have a lot of pressure…gotta let them cool down before opening!
- Being authentic (even if it makes you uncomfortable to do so) goes a long way in avoiding communication games and problems in cooperation in the long run
- The best thing about life is no matter how well I think I know myself, I continue to surprise myself each day.
- Just about any career can be frustrating at some point. Dedication is sometimes just as important as “liking” what you are doing.
- Every happiness is temporary (once you get used to it, it no longer makes you happy). In college it was like a dream to think about working for Google. Then when I had the choice, I saw something better…now it doesn’t seem like a big deal.
- Hollywood/Bollywood has really diluted the meaning of the word love. Love is not what I felt for some girl in high school, nor is love buying your wife a necklace or flowers…love is the years and years of dedication and sacrifice my parents have gone through for me. We should love by doing and showing, not by saying.
- Success is more about persistence than intelligence. If you look at most successful entrepreneurs, their successful venture was not their first.
- Days, months, years pass by faster and faster as life goes on. In school, one year seemed so long. Now…just yesterday I was joining Yahoo!, and now it has already been 7 months.
- Life is short, but days are long. It’s surprising how much you can accomplish in one day only. I saw a bracelet in the sky mall catalogue on a plane once that read “Nothing is worth more than this day.” Keep that in mind.
- It is more important to do right than be right.
- Speeding is not worth it.
- While making life decisions, forget about people, because people forget about everything. Next year there will be something else to talk about.
- You can take the man out of kachchh, but you cannot take the kachchh out of the man.
- Loyalty is important. If you don’t toil for your family, who else have you got?
- Obsessive saving is harmful. Never forget why you are saving money in the first place…is it worth sacrificing your (and your family’s) daily well being/comfort to save money? No. It is not. If you spend all day worrying about how to save $1, you will miss the opportunity to make $1000.
- Don’t waste your time on jealousy, sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.
- The best advice I got in high school still applies today in different ways: “Don’t worry about your grades. Worry about what you learn, and your grades will take care of themselves.”
May 8th, 2006
Steve Palina has written a very good series on his blog about self-discipline. (He is also a vegan). This is a six part series. You will find links to all six sections at the bottom of the following post, which is the part one.
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/06/self-discipline/
Infact I find many many insightful articles on Steve’s blog. You all may find other articles interesting as well and you could consider reading it regularly. He describes himself as:
Steve Pavlina is a blue-eyed, colorblind, left-handed, well educated, vegan, lucid dreaming, purpose driven, happily jobless, reality manipulating, meditation practicing, risk taking, goal seeking, problem solving, early rising, passive income generating, highly motivated, energetic, disciplined, persistent, optimistic, fearless, and proactive… writer, speaker, blogger, podcaster, computer programmer, game developer, entrepreneur, husband, father, and archetypal Aries.
Enjoy and share your thoughts.
May 3rd, 2006
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